A Saturday night off, a deer killed my car and I got a snuggie for my smallest pooch.
Oct 17, 2009 Randomness
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So it’s cold here tonight, about 37 degrees to be exact, therefore my outdoor show at Bengals in Columbia was cancelled. I was kind of bummed, but also kind of excited to spend a Saturday night with my wife. Very nice. We’re boring so we went out to run a few errands and then were heading back to the house to catch up on some Tivo and turn in early, yes, I am such a rockstar.
Unfortunately on my way home from Overland Park I was driving about 63 miles per hour when a full grown, big ass deer decided to cross 150 highway without yielding to oncoming traffic. What a dick. Anybody who is familiar with 150 highway knows it’s a scary as hell 2 lane highway full of hills and blindspots. So I hit this bohemath and was forced into the oncoming lane…..over a hill. Perfect. My wife, the animal lover, is crying hysterically, I’m trying like hell to get the Odyssey back to my side of the lane before a Semi would have to hose me off of his grill the way I’m going to have to hose the deer off of mine. I’m such an idiot. I hit this thing, as I mentioned before doing roughly 63 mph, and I calmed my wife down by saying, I think the front of the van is fine, we just need to find a car wash. So I pulled into the gas station and slowed down, the engine made a weird noise, like playing cards in a bicycle tire from the olden days. So I got out to survey the damage and lookeee what I saw:
It’s going to need more than a hose. Shit. Looks like I’ll be calling my friendly Shelter Insurance agent first thing Monday morning. Luckily the van was drive-able, so I made it home and plan to be in bed by 10:00, and most importantly the snuggie that we got for our little dog Lucy fit perfectly and she loved it.
See, we found her 18 months ago at a gas station where she had been dumped, by some bag of douche. Now she’s living the dream people, snuggie and all. Sweet dreams, and c’mon deer season. Oh, and go Mizzou. Nighty night.
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